4 Reasons I Thought I Couldn’t Go to Rehab and Why I Was Wrong

Matthew Serel • August 9, 2021

4 Reasons I Thought I Couldn’t Go to Rehab and Why I Was Wrong

If you’re like me, and being presented with the choice to go to rehab, your initial reaction is probably “no way”. Going to treatment is scary. It means that you:


  1. Admitted you have a problem that is out of your control. 
  2. Have to put your life, that probably is already in shambles, on hold without being able to immediately and directly address your problems.
  3. Will need to rely on others, whether it is your boss, colleagues, or family members to pick up the slack on your responsibilities for something that you already feel a lot of shame around.
  4. Not address, and probably worsen, any financial insecurity you already have. 


Any one of these alone is scary, let alone all of these together. I thought it might be helpful for others processing the thought of going to treatment for me to explain how each of these items pertained to me, and why going to treatment was the best thing I ever did for myself. 


Admitting that I had a problem that was out of my control.


For me, this was probably the hardest hurdle to overcome before I accepted I would go to inpatient treatment. I prided myself as someone who was a self starter, an entrepreneur, and to me the thought of asking for help was not only a sign of weakness, but something that would literally shatter my ego.


What I ended up learning is that asking for help when you need it is actually a strength. You will not meet a single successful person who got to where they are without the help of a team around them. This is so apparent in every facet of my life today. 


I can’t possibly take time away from my work and personal life right now to go to treatment. 


At the point it became obvious that I needed to go to treatment, I had just recovered from a second ankle surgery, was operating a startup that wasn’t doing so well at the time, and had taken out about $200,000 in debt to fund that startup. In addition, I had just moved in with my girlfriend, and our relationship wasn’t in the best of places at the time. 


To me, leaving my company and life behind for 30 days seemed like the absolute worst thing to do to resolve the mess that my life had become. 


Looking back, it was the absolute best use of my time. Those 30 days gave me the space to work on myself. Treatment gave me the tools to be capable of addressing the monumental task of rebuilding my company and personal life. Not to say it was easy, but it at least put me back on the level playing field that everyone else was operating on. 


Since returning from treatment, that failing company starting growing over 100% year over year to an eventual sale, I’m now married to the amazing woman who was my girlfriend at the time, and we are about to have our second child! 


None of this would have been possible if I didn’t take care of myself first. 


How can I possibly ask others to pick up my slack as I go on “vacation” for 30 days when I’ve already made such a mess of everything that surrounds me? 


As I mentioned above, I wasn’t winning at life. I think that is actually the point here. Despite my best efforts, I was making a mess of everything. It seems insane that I would think continuing to try the same interventions would result in a better outcome. 


The other thing I’ve realized is that if the situations were reversed, I would have been more than happy to step up and help out a struggling family member or colleague. However, for some reason, I felt that asking someone else to do the same was putting a burden on them. In reality, this was more of a projection of where I saw my self worth, rather than an actual impediment on my recovery. 


I literally can’t afford to go to treatment right now. 


Again, as I mentioned earlier, I felt immense financial pressure already between my personal expenses, debt I had taken out for my company, and the fact I was also responsible for my employees’ payroll. However, I didn’t take the following into consideration:


  1. The amount I was spending on drugs was by far my largest expense. 
  2. I had no problem indebting myself for other “socially acceptable” investments such as school, and my company.


The reality for me was that I couldn’t afford not to go to treatment. I needed to look at the cost of treatment, not as an expense, but as potentially the highest yield investment I could make. 


The truth is that was exactly my experience. Going to treatment was by far the best investment I’ve ever made. It started me on a trajectory that not only gave me my life back, but one that has been far more lucrative and enjoyable than one I could have ever imagined for myself. 


Going to treatment is HARD but you are worth it. 


If you’re struggling with the choice to go to treatment, or if now doesn’t seem like the right time, I hear you. However, YOU ARE WORTH IT, and this investment in yourself will be the best one you ever make not just for yourself, but everyone you interact with. 

Jason's Story - From Rock Bottom to New Heights: My Journey of Recovery and Reinvention

By Jason Ertrachter • February 4, 2025
With over a decade of alcohol and drug abuse, it became clear I could not drink responsibly or consume in moderation. Upon further review, I came to understand I was never able to drink responsibly and was predisposed to consume in excess. Moderation is a construct I still don’t understand. Alcohol, drugs, sugar, ego, all things I love to indulge in. At 25 years old, weeks before the pandemic, I found myself being escorted by security from my beloved office in a sought-after industry in a glamorous part of Los Angeles. Pursuing a career in talent management, the late nights, weekly drinking, daily drug use culminated in the unavoidable fear, anxiety and sense of calamity that led me to recovery. I asked myself, “What was the common denominator between lost jobs, friends lost, arrests, hurt feelings and selfishness?” People, places, things were always changing, but the one constant in my story was me with drugs and alcohol. Walking into the West Hollywood Recovery Center on Monday February 5th, 2020 at noon was not my first meeting. It was, however, the first meeting at which I listened and actually took suggestions. Meetings as a teenager, and again in college when my drug use got bad, were simply to get people off my back. As I look back, I understand that I actually needed to get out of my own way, not have those who loved me off of my back. I am grateful to have gotten sober during a time when the world shut down and so many struggled. I had nowhere to go, no outside distractions to challenge my commitment. I fully emerged myself in meetings and all that AA had to offer for young people. There were thousands of virtual meetings at every hour of the day, but more importantly, rooms and outdoor meetings in LA that never missed a beat. There was an underground community of meeting makers that continued to go to in-person meetings, masks on, hugs and fellowship. I found that the work of early recovery far outweighed the isolation. I left the entertainment industry with two years of sobriety. New career opportunities opened up pretty quickly for me. Transitioning into the startup and tech sales world, I was able to move back home to New York and be closer to my family. As my sobriety continued, new career paths continued to present themselves. When I was introduced to Matt and AJ, I was immediately impressed with their mission and welcomed the opportunity to join the team. I am confident that the combination of my personal and professional success, as well as my CARC, CRPA certification, made my decision the perfect one for me. Having hit my stride in my own recovery, I now see that that my purpose is to help others. It is a purpose I do not take lightly. I bring the same energy and focus that has helped me to get where I am today to other individuals and families alike looking for a better way.

Stephanie's Story - My Journey to Addiction Recovery and Giving Back

By Stephanie Myers, CPRS • January 29, 2025
My name is Stephanie Myers, and I am excited to be part of the incredible team at You Are Accountable . As difficult as my journey prior to recovery was, I am grateful for every step along the way. My recovery journey began five years ago through what I believe was divine intervention. At my lowest point—mentally, physically, and spiritually—I was led to a 12-step recovery program. Most of my life was spent seeking relief from my internal and external struggles. During my teenage years, I thought I had found a solution, but my addiction only progressed, leading me to the depths of despair. My addiction compromised my morals, diminished my integrity, and left me with a profound sense of hopelessness. Overwhelmed by guilt and shame, I realized that everything in my life had to change. I became willing to do whatever it took to shift the trajectory of my life. Gradually, I connected with others who understood my pain and had found their way to recovery. I dedicated myself to internal work and began to fill the spiritual void that I had been attempting to fill with substances. Today, my life is filled with purpose, love, and more beauty than I could have ever imagined five years ago. It is my passion to help others realize that there is hope on the other side of addiction. As a Certified Peer Recovery Specialist, I strive to help plant the seed of recovery and help others grow along their path to recovery.

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By Brittany Pealer, CRPS • January 28, 2025
My name is Brittany, and I’m honored to be part of the team at You Are Accountable . My journey to recovery has been filled with struggles, lessons, and, ultimately, transformation. For years, I lived in the utter hopelessness of addiction, believing there was no way out. A "normal" life felt completely out of reach, and even as a child, I never felt like I had a true purpose. Throughout my active addiction, I found myself trapped in a relentless cycle. I would put one substance down—whether through treatment or court-ordered intervention—but almost immediately, I would pick up another. Each time, I restarted the same painful, destructive cycle, convinced that I could never break free. It wasn’t until I realized that recovery is an inside job that things began to change. Changing people, places, and things (and substances) can only do so much for so long; true recovery requires doing the hard work within. My turning point came when I became pregnant with my first daughter. For the first time in my life, I found a reason to fight for something greater than myself. That moment marked the beginning of my journey to recovery, and through that journey, I discovered the life I never thought was possible. Today, I’m blessed with an amazing job, a beautiful family with two incredible daughters, and an active role in my recovery community. As a Certified Peer Recovery Specialist (CPRS) and Recovery Coach, I am passionate about helping others find hope and healing. I understand the challenges of breaking free from addiction, and I’m living proof that it’s possible to create a life filled with purpose, joy, and connection. Recovery has given me everything I once believed was out of reach, and I’m honored to walk alongside others as they embark on their own journeys to freedom.
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