Embracing Our Essence: A Women's History Month Reflection on Rediscovering and Celebrating Authentic Womanhood

Ailish Abbate, PRC • March 22, 2024

To all the women reading this, it's clear that the mantle of womanhood carries an immense burden. Our surroundings incessantly dictate the essence of being a woman, often presenting a paradox: to embody everything yet simultaneously embody the antithesis. The act of womanhood propels us far from our origins, to the extent of erasing the memory of our childhood streets. It nudges us toward oblivion, making us forget our desires, preferences, and identities. Navigating womanhood correctly seems an unattainable feat, pushing us to seek love, acceptance, and validation externally.

I, too, succumbed to these norms of womanhood, adhering to expectations that dictated my body size, compliance, and emotional expression. I was taught that self-prioritization is selfish, that expressing emotions is overly dramatic, and that any display of humanity is frowned upon. I believed that to fit in, I had to diminish myself—altering my appearance, interests, and essence. In a world where self-love is an act of defiance, I desperately sought validation elsewhere.

My encounter with drugs and alcohol falsely promised me inclusion into the desired mold of womanhood, allowing me to display the traits I believed were necessary. However, this pursuit led me to a breaking point, bending over backward to conform to an imposed standard. Sobriety became the key to liberating my true self, embarking on a journey back to my roots. It has allowed me to reconstruct the meaning of womanhood, celebrating qualities like compassion, strength, intelligence, bravery, sensitivity, and wisdom. The burdens I once bore have been replaced with profound gratitude for the honor of belonging to the extraordinary collective known as women.

In celebration of International Women's Day, let's embrace the diversity and strength inherent in womanhood, forging a path of empowerment and self-discovery.

By Jason Ertrachter February 4, 2025
With over a decade of alcohol and drug abuse, it became clear I could not drink responsibly or consume in moderation. Upon further review, I came to understand I was never able to drink responsibly and was predisposed to consume in excess. Moderation is a construct I still don’t understand. Alcohol, drugs, sugar, ego, all things I love to indulge in. At 25 years old, weeks before the pandemic, I found myself being escorted by security from my beloved office in a sought-after industry in a glamorous part of Los Angeles. Pursuing a career in talent management, the late nights, weekly drinking, daily drug use culminated in the unavoidable fear, anxiety and sense of calamity that led me to recovery. I asked myself, “What was the common denominator between lost jobs, friends lost, arrests, hurt feelings and selfishness?” People, places, things were always changing, but the one constant in my story was me with drugs and alcohol. Walking into the West Hollywood Recovery Center on Monday February 5th, 2020 at noon was not my first meeting. It was, however, the first meeting at which I listened and actually took suggestions. Meetings as a teenager, and again in college when my drug use got bad, were simply to get people off my back. As I look back, I understand that I actually needed to get out of my own way, not have those who loved me off of my back. I am grateful to have gotten sober during a time when the world shut down and so many struggled. I had nowhere to go, no outside distractions to challenge my commitment. I fully emerged myself in meetings and all that AA had to offer for young people. There were thousands of virtual meetings at every hour of the day, but more importantly, rooms and outdoor meetings in LA that never missed a beat. There was an underground community of meeting makers that continued to go to in-person meetings, masks on, hugs and fellowship. I found that the work of early recovery far outweighed the isolation. I left the entertainment industry with two years of sobriety. New career opportunities opened up pretty quickly for me. Transitioning into the startup and tech sales world, I was able to move back home to New York and be closer to my family. As my sobriety continued, new career paths continued to present themselves. When I was introduced to Matt and AJ, I was immediately impressed with their mission and welcomed the opportunity to join the team. I am confident that the combination of my personal and professional success, as well as my CARC, CRPA certification, made my decision the perfect one for me. Having hit my stride in my own recovery, I now see that that my purpose is to help others. It is a purpose I do not take lightly. I bring the same energy and focus that has helped me to get where I am today to other individuals and families alike looking for a better way.
By Stephanie Myers, CPRS January 29, 2025
My name is Stephanie Myers, and I am excited to be part of the incredible team at You Are Accountable . As difficult as my journey prior to recovery was, I am grateful for every step along the way. My recovery journey began five years ago through what I believe was divine intervention. At my lowest point—mentally, physically, and spiritually—I was led to a 12-step recovery program. Most of my life was spent seeking relief from my internal and external struggles. During my teenage years, I thought I had found a solution, but my addiction only progressed, leading me to the depths of despair. My addiction compromised my morals, diminished my integrity, and left me with a profound sense of hopelessness. Overwhelmed by guilt and shame, I realized that everything in my life had to change. I became willing to do whatever it took to shift the trajectory of my life. Gradually, I connected with others who understood my pain and had found their way to recovery. I dedicated myself to internal work and began to fill the spiritual void that I had been attempting to fill with substances. Today, my life is filled with purpose, love, and more beauty than I could have ever imagined five years ago. It is my passion to help others realize that there is hope on the other side of addiction. As a Certified Peer Recovery Specialist, I strive to help plant the seed of recovery and help others grow along their path to recovery.
By Brittany Pealer, CRPS January 28, 2025
My name is Brittany, and I’m honored to be part of the team at You Are Accountable . My journey to recovery has been filled with struggles, lessons, and, ultimately, transformation. For years, I lived in the utter hopelessness of addiction, believing there was no way out. A "normal" life felt completely out of reach, and even as a child, I never felt like I had a true purpose. Throughout my active addiction, I found myself trapped in a relentless cycle. I would put one substance down—whether through treatment or court-ordered intervention—but almost immediately, I would pick up another. Each time, I restarted the same painful, destructive cycle, convinced that I could never break free. It wasn’t until I realized that recovery is an inside job that things began to change. Changing people, places, and things (and substances) can only do so much for so long; true recovery requires doing the hard work within. My turning point came when I became pregnant with my first daughter. For the first time in my life, I found a reason to fight for something greater than myself. That moment marked the beginning of my journey to recovery, and through that journey, I discovered the life I never thought was possible. Today, I’m blessed with an amazing job, a beautiful family with two incredible daughters, and an active role in my recovery community. As a Certified Peer Recovery Specialist (CPRS) and Recovery Coach, I am passionate about helping others find hope and healing. I understand the challenges of breaking free from addiction, and I’m living proof that it’s possible to create a life filled with purpose, joy, and connection. Recovery has given me everything I once believed was out of reach, and I’m honored to walk alongside others as they embark on their own journeys to freedom.
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