Alcohol Awareness Month: Decide Who You Want to Be!

“The only person you are destined to become is the person you decide to be.” - Ralph Waldo Emerson
It’s April and it’s alcohol awareness month! This hits close to home for myself, because alcohol was definitely my drug of choice. I cannot describe how challenging it was for me to face the fact that I had a problem with alcohol and then to choose to eliminate it from my life. I did do it, and I am continually so grateful for my recovery, and to be free from the torture of brain-erasing blackouts and hellacious hangovers. Nowadays, I get to work with people who’ve also chosen to leave alcohol behind once and for all and embark on their own path of recovery. It’s so gratifying to be able to give them hope, and guide them to the inevitable light at the end of the tunnel. A light that can be very difficult to see in the very beginning! But don’t worry, it’s there. 

Working at You Are Accountable the past year and a half or so, I have seen a good deal of people succeed at staying sober from alcohol, and I’ve gotten to see their lives become a lot better. There are some definite commonalities I have observed with those who’ve been successful at staying sober. There is one in particular that I’d like to focus on for the purpose of this blog, because it can be extremely powerful, but it seems so obvious that it’s often overlooked. 

Pretty much everyone I have worked with who has a decent amount of sober time, somewhere along the line, made a solid decision that they were done with alcohol. I recently learned that the word “decide” comes from the Latin word ‘decidere’ which is actually two words put together: “de”= off and “cadere”= cut. So, when you ‘decide’ something, you are cutting off the possibility of whatever would go against your decision. 

Now, the decision to stop drinking can be tremendously difficult, given how socially acceptable it is to drink. Alcohol is so often associated with the idea of fun that when faced with the decision to give it up, a person can very easily become terrified that a sober life will mean a life completely ‘cut off’ from fun in every form! This fear is actually just an illusion. 
What actually happens is that you cut yourself off from allowing alcohol use to continue to destroy your health, life and relationships. In any event, the fear that sobriety will be a much more boring form of hell can feel completely real, and prevents a lot of people from actually making the decision to stop. 

The thing is, something kind of magical happens when a person really decides, as in, they are determined not to turn back. They are done with the old version of themselves and ready for a whole new reality, as they take their first little baby step forward into recovery. It’s almost as if, since they are choosing life, life provides them the support they need. 

During one of my recent Instagram scrolls,  I saw a post which read, “When you leap, the net appears”. This instantly brought me back to my own journey, way back when I first got sober. I had no idea what life would be like without alcohol (or drugs) but I feared it would not be fun. However, I also knew, based on experience, that continuing to drink would continue to be a living hell for me. 

There was a part of me that was big enough, and strong enough, and loved myself enough to just say, “Okay- I am gonna do this and not look back”. In that moment of decision and surrender, releasing my old reality for a new one which I couldn’t even really see- my “net” appeared in the form of the most supportive people imaginable. These were people who were further down their own path and were willing to come and guide me down mine. It was a whole new beginning!

I have witnessed this so many times, and I have to say that it really appears to me that life seems to reward those who can make it past that fear barrier. Once they decide, surrender, and take that leap of faith, their own personal net just magically appears. Everything just begins to unfold in a way that supports their decision. Really what it is, is they are choosing themselves. Their life, their health, their happiness, their own peace of mind.

Something else worth mentioning that I have seen in those who’ve maintained their sobriety tend to do so by replacing the habit of drinking with a healthy habit, hobby or just any routine activity that brings them joy, life, satisfaction, happiness, etc. It can be anything, but most commonly what I see people replace their drinking habit with is some form of exercise. 

This can look like working out, walking with a walking group every day, or coaching a team. This is just my own observation but from what I have seen, those who engage in some form of exercise regularly in early recovery appear to heal and transform faster than those who do not. A lot lose weight, and may begin to socialize with other people who are also focused on their health. They just seem to be happier, less depressed or stressed out in general. 

Since there are so many benefits to regular exercise for everyone, not just those who are in recovery, they get to enjoy those benefits along with being proud of themselves for putting their energy into something that makes them healthier, stronger, less stressed, more physically fit, attractive, etc. As opposed to drinking alcohol which will make you more depressed and lead to all kinds of health issues. This is a positive change.

Another wonderful replacement for drinking is attending support groups, of course, and there are so many to choose from! The best thing about Accountable is that we offer support groups multiple times a week, conveniently over Zoom, with lots of cool people!

The last thing I wanted to mention here is that those who have done really well with the You Are Accountable program are those who engage with me regularly as their recovery coach. When I was in early recovery I had people who truly believed in me, my potential and could see my positive qualities. This had a HUGE impact on me, and I am forever trying to emulate this with the people I work with. It’s so easy to see the good in them. I simply point out what’s already so great about them, get them to notice too, and then magnify and celebrate those qualities until they feel empowered to be the person they were always meant to be! It truly does all begin with a decision, but oftentimes, after the decision is made, life naturally begins to flow in the direction of recovery. There are so many people who’ve been there and are willing to support you!

If you’ve come to the place where you’ve made that decision and need or would love help staying accountable to your recovery, then we are here to help :)